Life Lately

     What a weekend! I had the opportunity to hang out in Budapest with Leah. We went to see Cirque Du Soleil's Quidam. It was an amazing experience. I was blown away by their strength. This morning, I woke up exhausted from all the walking. I dragged myself out of bed to make it to devos. The person teaching hit a point that really impacted me. He said this: "rules and boundaries are good - and even necessary- but they cannot replace the work that happens in a life that is experiencing the Holy Spirit. Flesh cannot sanctify flesh." It was yet another reminder to me that Jesus wants to meet with me. He desires to fill us with His spirit so we can experience true victory. Rules are great. I love order and doing my best. The thing to watch out for is pride. Goodness cannot save us. One can be good, honorable, kind, giving, serving and still lack the sanctification that comes through the blood Jesus shed. It is only when we invest time in Our relationship with Jesus and wait upon Him that we see our need for His Holy Spirit. So much to take in! (Especially half asleep)
     Humility comes in many packages lately. The newest one? Hungarian worship songs. I cannot begin to tell you how hard it is to sing them. My mouth refuses to put the sounds together. My brain cannot make sense of the letters. I sang songs we have already done, but I couldn't even get through them. So frustrating! I have spent 2 hours phonetically writing out the songs so my brain will stop trying to read them. I am almost though 10,000 reasons. So sad. Only 2 more to go!
     Sickness has been rampant lately in our home. In this entire facility, actually. We have had it all. The past week my stomach issues began to resurface. It was kind of odd since I really haven't been eating. I am a little concerned with that, and sad because I don't want to go see a hungarian dr. I know it would be wise, because we will not have medical insurance when we first go back to the states, but the experiences we have had with the dr here has been pointless. They do no tests, not even an exam. They ask your symptom, then treat it. All for $100... No thanks!
     The weather has been beautiful this week! I even wore sandals and a sweatshirt (and got yelled at) yesterday. I was so excited that I grabbed a pair of Capri workout pants this morning. Reality hit when I looked at the temperature and it was 28 degrees... No capris for me! Cue layers.
     Amidst all that we have experienced the past 6 months here in Hungary, there has been a presence- a knowing I cannot explain- that has seen us through. Life is hard. People forget you. Everything changes. But reality awakens and shows you that life is so much more than you ever thought or knew it to be. That is the hope that keeps me going. There are less than 3 months left for us here in Hungary. There really is no plan after that. Anyone that knows me knows that this is so contrary to my personality. Yet God, with His peace, has given me a calm I cannot understand. People have so many questions. (Which will only increase in the next week or so). I have never said "I don't know" so much in my life! Living through the past few years has taught me one thing- no matter what you are going through, life will still go on. At times I honestly felt like I could not go on. God is faithful, and will remain so because He cannot deny Himself. There are still areas of my life that He has to repair, restore, and redeem. However, I am hopeful that He can remove the shards of my broken heart and replace them with a heart of flesh. This song has really ministered to me recently. It is called Sinking Deep. Listen to it and be blessed! Speaking of songs, I must get back to work!