Wilderness

Waiting... I am waiting to go home, so I am not able to "be" here. Have you ever experienced that feeling? I am waiting to find home. I am waiting to return to it. I really don't even know what "home" is anymore. This week I began a new study from Beth Moore. It was a little bittersweet, but very needed. It is on the book of Deuteronomy. Yup- Deuteronomy! I know, you may be asking the same questions I did. I was skeptical but not disappointed! It was exactly what I needed to hear. Her main point being that, like the children of Israel, God did not bring us out of something to leave us there. He brought us out to bring us in. I am not quite sure what that means in my life right now. I mean, at face value I get it. I understand the concept, but I don't know what it will look like. The children of Israel were called out of bondage, they were asked to go through the wilderness, but they were not intended to stay there for 40 years! Their rebellion kept them there that long. They were delivered from slavery to go through the wilderness- not wander around it. How many of us hang out in the wilderness- pitiful and hopeless? We are provided for so we stay. The wilderness is meant to bring us into a reliance of our Heavenly Father. The Israelites watched as God removed them from bondage, parted seas, guided them, and provided their nourishment daily. Yet, they camped there. Fear kept them from going forward. They stayed- stuck- for 40 years. Unable to see that God was guiding them through the wilderness to give them the promised land. They are a reminder to us. God's chosen people. We are not to remain in the wilderness and wander. God is not bringing us out to leave us, but to draw us closer to Him. Then, He will guide us to what He has for us. What a difficult thing to swallow! I have never been in a place of such uncertainty in my life. I feel afraid. Unsure of God's grace and abilities to work in our situation. It is so hard to find the strength to keep moving. I am beginning to see why they camped in the wilderness! So, waiting? I guess I can do this! Only through the grace of God. He will help me through this strange new season of "wilderness" and guide us to the things He has for us. I must simply rely upon His steadfastness to persevere in this.